PLACERVILLE — Through it all, the kidnapping, the repeated sexual assaults and the isolation of being hidden away for over 18 years, Jaycee Dugard survived by playing the good girl.
She followed the orders of the serial sex offender who had immobilized her with a stun gun in June 1991, stashed her in his car and then laughed to his accomplice-wife that he couldn't believe he had gotten away with it.
Over the following months, if Dugard balked at his commands, Phillip Garrido terrorized her by turning on the gun so she could hear it "zap."
"I didn't want it to happen again, so I was good," she recalled in vivid grand jury testimony released Thursday after her abductors were sentenced to prison. She "tried to do what he wanted me to do even though I didn't like it."
The testimony was unsealed at the request of several media organizations, including The Associated Press. Detailed descriptions of sex abuse were redacted, but the testimony painted a portrait of a vulnerable child, teenager and young woman who fought to preserve her innocence and spirit and protect the two daughters she had with Garrido.
For months, the only person she saw was Garrido, who locked her inside a backyard studio and brought her meals.
When she confessed feeling lonely, he gave her a cat, which he took away once it started urinating indoors. He introduced her to his wife, Nancy, and Dugard was moved into another backyard room where the three of them would sleep.
After assaulting Dugard, Garrido "would, like, go get food, and we'd sit up and watch TV and movies and stuff," she recalled. "I had told them my birthday, and so they came in... And they gave me some Barbie stuff because they knew I liked to play with Barbies."
Garrido also gained control over his young hostage by manipulating her confusion. He at first refused to tell her why he had taken her, or even his name. But he eventually persuaded her that "I was helping somebody, even though it was in a really sick, perverted way," Dugard recalled.